How Can A Husband Grow As A Prayer Leader In The Family?
Q: I struggle with leading prayer in my family. My prayers are short, sincere, and Spirit-led, but my wife’s prayers are longer and more Scripture-filled. Is this a problem? How can I grow as a prayer leader?
A: Inga-Lill Guzik: That’s just the nature of men and women.
David Guzik: There have been times when you and I have prayed together and I pray for, like, 30 seconds just like this fellow says: my prayers are short and concise, yet genuine and Spirit-filled. But then you’ll pray for 20 minutes.
First of all, that’s normal. At least it’s normal to us. We recognize that. But secondly, I would just say this. I don’t mean to criticize the wife, but I will offer this word of correction: when you’re praying together with somebody, you need to pray in a way that will keep them in the prayer. If you go on for 15 minutes on a solo prayer, you’re going to lose them. I’m not one to say how long an individual’s prayer should be when they pray together, but if it’s too long in one group, then you lose that principle of agreement with them in prayer. You get to the place where the other person isn’t agreeing with you in prayer, but they’re just waiting for you to stop praying.
Inga-Lill Guzik: Well, I’m hoping that’s not the case, but that doesn’t necessarily need to be the case. In this situation, maybe the whole idea of not being so engaged is what bothers him. But I think styles are different. Think about this. You’re two individuals coming together before Almighty God. You’re going to be different. You’re going to approach it differently. So, your differences shouldn’t pull you apart. It should bring you together and help you acknowledge that you don’t want to change her, and you don’t want her to change you. You need to be who God has made you in relation to Himself. And if it changes over time, as the Swedish proverb says, you become like those you are with. You become more like each other.